Que Será, Será?

I randomly heard this song, most famously recorded by Doris Day, and it took me back to my childhood. My mom used to sing it to me. And, while the lyrics in their simplicity are among the few my brain has retained, the message was for the first time loud and clear.

What ever happens, happens.

When I was just a little girl
I asked my mother, what will I be
Will I be pretty
Will I be rich
Here's what she said to me

Que será, será
Whatever will be, will be
The future's not ours to see
Que será, será
What will be, will be

And, while technically true [very few of us have crystal balls, and I never did put my faith in my Magic 8 Ball], it’s also quite defeatist. The message I hear? Everything is out of our control - it’s out of our hands - whatever happens, will happen. If we take this attitude to heart, we’ll probably ask ourselves, Why bother?

·       I’m bored and stuck in a rut. The future will be whatever it is. Things will change.

·       I feel stuck in my career, but, why bother taking positive action to make my situation better?

·       I’m not sure I’m spending my time and energy on what matters most, but I don’t know what will happen tomorrow, so why bother figuring it out?

Whatever will happen, will happen.

What if you turn that thinking on its head? 

One of the most effective ways to do this is to create a vision for the life you want.  It may seem silly, and it will take some time, but having a clear vision helps keep us on the path we want to be on.  As life happens, it can be easy to let all the little distractions and new priorities get in the way of where we see our life going.  Without an idea of your destination, how can you possibly choose all the right paths?

But, imagining our ideal life – 6 months, 1 year, or 5 years from now – ensures we stay on course, that our inner compass helps guide us.  No, we can’t imagine every obstacle, but we can know where we want to go.  Imagine this.  You set out to go to work Monday morning.  Of course, you know your destination.  You can probably even picture the route in your mind.  But, you take a left turn, only to find the road is closed.  An obstacle.  But you still know your destination, so you choose a new route.  You adapt and flex to the obstacle. 

Now, imagine you have a meeting.  You set out from your house only to realise you have no idea where the meeting is.  Literally, it could be anywhere in town.  You don’t have an email detailing your destination, your boss or your PA aren’t answering their phone, and all you know is the meeting is not at the office.  Where do you start?  How do you plan your route?

You need a vision of the destination before you can set out. 

And the same is true for life. 

Royale Scuderi writes, “Perhaps the best way to look at the concept of a life vision is as a compass to help guide you to take the best actions and make the right choices that help propel you toward your best life.”

How do you create your ideal vision?  Well, that’s up to you, really.  It’s important to give yourself time and space to do so.  Rarely do we take the time to dedicate to ourselves this way and it can feel a little uncomfortable at first. 

I’ve found the best way is to think of the timeframe I’m creating my vision for.  Is it 6 months or 5 years down the line?  And start from there.

Ask yourself:

-       What do I want?

-       What is important to me? Like, super duper deep down important to me, not what other people think should be important to me.

-       If money didn’t matter, what would I be doing with my time?

-       What does success look like to me?

Then create an image of what your life looks like in the future.  Write it, record it, or make a fancy pants vision board.  It’s yours, so make it your own.

-       Where do I live? Be specific.  Maybe it’s a modern penthouse overlooking the skyline.  Maybe it’s a chic beach house, where you can hear the sound of the waves lulling you awake.

-       What does my ideal day look like?

-       Who do I live with? Who are the people around me?

-       What do I look like? Am I happy with that?

-       Am I in love, like super duper deep down in love, with this vision?  If not, dig deeper. 

Dream big.

Keep asking yourself questions until you have a precise and specific vision.  The next step is to start to take action, to start on the path of making this vision for yourself a reality.  Every journey starts with a small step.

And the most crucial step is to know where you’re going. 

The future IS ours to see.

Are you ready to take the next step and design the life you want? Get in touch with me at https://www.yourcompasswithin.co/get-in-touch/ and book a 45 minute complimentary connection call, or visit my website to see what I can do for you and to hear more of my story. www.YourCompassWithin.co

Kristen Franey