Half Assed No More!

Word on the street is that I'm trending. On Social.

Uh, yeah, so whatever.

What I do know is that some of my posts are starting to reach more people. And, while this is a good thing, it also tends to bring with it the crazies and the people who hide behind the internet spewing vitriol.

I know this, because before going viral was a thing, I went viral. Sort of.

My ex filmed me while I was parking on a super steep hill. Driving a stick. On the left side of the road. Oh. Parallel parking. He thought it would be funny because I would screw up, for all those reasons, plus I am a woman. Truth be told, I did not screw up, for the one very good reason that I am an ace driver.

The video did get uploaded to YouTube. And, maybe I did go over the curb a little, but I also did a pretty good job and remembered to turn the wheels toward said curb, thereby, in my book, negating the slight mishap. But, we digress, because this isn't about points in parking. It is about the fact that people told me they hated me for wasting 43 seconds of their life. [IMHO, this is what you get for Googling BAD LADY DRIVERS, or you know, just watching mindless stuff on YouTube. It's not me wasting your life.] That I didn't deserve to own a car. [Woo Hoo! It was a rental, so nothing to worry about here!] That I was stupid. [This one always gave me a little chuckle.]

And, now, in the era of social, I posted a picture of what is a pretty significant transformation - from a woman stuck on the hamster wheel, unhappy and unhealthy, to a woman who has taken control and is making all the wise decisions. That woman is me.

I won’t lie: I am proud of this transformation. Not only is it physical, but it is mental and spiritual, external and internal.

I realised through this process that one of my biggest behaviours had been doing things half-assed. Rather than throw my whole self in - because when I didn't succeed, the sense of failure would be too difficult to bear - I held back and only went in halfway. In order to protect myself from possible negative comments or embarrassment or criticism, I chose not to live up to my full potential. Does that sound familiar?

The internal change is the biggest and most profound for me, and it manifests in what you see. You know the old adage, What you see is what you get? In my case, it couldn't be more true.

Hidden among the ridiculously positive comments in that recent post about the changes I've made to both my health and mindset was one that was very different. This person wasn't like the trolls I came across in the days of the old YouTube parking video. This person commented that he happily smokes and drinks and pulls girls half his age. [The fact he calls us 'girls' and not women is probably telling another chapter of his story.]

And then he said, if being vegan does it for me, then he wishes me all the best. As of yesterday, and all of the rest of my life, I was not vegan. Vegetarian [well, pescatarian], yes. Vegan, no. Yet rather than take offence at this man's leap in logic, I saw his challenge of my former self that he has never met. I have been half-assed by choosing to be vegetarian [well, pescatarian]. If I am to fully and truly live my life by going all in, the no-brainer is that as of writing this, I am living a plant based life.

Kristen Franey